#032. Angela Bailey - United States Naval Academy Protocol Advisor to the Commandant of Midshipmen and Brigade Social Instructor

Angela Bailey is the Protocol Advisor to the Commandant of Midshipmen and Brigade Social Director.

Angela Bailey once attended Ring Dance, and was impressed by the etiquette and manners of the Midshipmen. Her date informed her that Etiquette and Protocol is a part of a Midshipman’s curriculum all four years, and that they had an instructor for it all. Angela, having received formal etiquette training herself, remarked that it would be an interesting job to have, and now, years later, she’s doing exactly that. 

Angela is now the Protocol Advisor to the Commandant of Midshipmen and Social Instructor to the Brigade of Midshipmen. 

So what exactly are etiquette and protocol? Why are they things that matter among life and death military training? Grant—your Academy Insider—and Angela discuss that and more in this latest edition of the Academy Insider podcast. 

Angela shares, when you are a Midshipman, you are an “ambassador of the United States, and of the United States Naval Academy, and the United States Navy once you’re in the fleet.”

“At the end of the day, [etiquette] is about putting others ahead of yourself.”

There are military protocols that Angela and similar advisors know, such as the proper order for dignitaries to be seated on stage at an event, or how flags must be situated. 

Plebes-to-be can look forward to one “very fancy, sit down dinner” during the first set of Plebe Summer training, which is the first opportunity that Angela will have to instruct the newest midshipmen. Later in the summer, Angela gets the plebes ready to meet their new sponsor families by teaching them sponsor etiquette.

From then on, Angela meets with each class of midshipmen once a semester for the rest of their time at the Academy. 

There are many more key learnings and insight into this unique aspect of the Academy, that only Angela can share.

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The mission of Academy Insider is to guide, serve, and support Midshipmen, future Midshipmen, and their families.

Grant Vermeer your host is the person who started it all. He is the founder of Academy Insider and the host of The Academy Insider podcast and the USNA Property Network Podcast. He was a recruited athlete which brought him to Annapolis where he was a four year member of the varsity basketball team. He was a cyber operations major and commissioned into the Cryptologic Warfare Community. He was stationed at Fort Meade and supported the Subsurface Direct Support mission.

He separated from the Navy in 2023 and now owns The Vermeer Group, a boutique residential real estate company that specializes in serving the United States Naval Academy community PCSing to California & Texas.

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Transcript

Grant:   0:03
This is your host Grant Vermeer Naval Academy class of 2017 and I'm your Academy Insider. It's my goal to be your guide through the Naval Academy experience. By sharing my stories and providing you inside information into the life of a shipment. Academy insider is in no way officially affiliated with the United States Naval Academy. All over the content on Academy Insider is my own and does not reflect the views of the United States Naval Academy, the United States Navy nor the Department of Defense. Fun fact number 8000 and 24 about the United States Naval Academy is that in order to graduate, you have to go through a curriculum of etiquette and protocol training. And so today, here, on Academy Insider, we're joined by Angela Bailey, who is the protocol adviser to the common Ottoman Shipman, as well as the social instructor to the brigade of midshipmen who is in charge of that curriculum, the protocol and etiquette of a naval officer. And so you guys are gonna learn all about that program today, as well as her new really direction and motivation and course for what she wants to impart on the brigade of midshipmen during their time in Annapolis. So make sure to check out this episode. She shares all of her stories about how she ended up at the Naval Academy. What the protocol and etiquette curriculum is all about. Just talks a little bit about life at us and a so make sure to tune into this episode and let me know what you guys think. Thanks. All right, everyone. And welcome to the Academy insider podcast again, this episode is going to be all about the protocol program at the United States Naval Academy and Angela. Thank you so much for taking the time to join us and share your expertise and insight into this topic regarding the United States Naval Academy.

Anglela:   1:43
Thank you for having me and excited,

Grant:   1:45
of course, before we get started in today's episode, if you don't mind giving a little bit of background to the academy inside our audience of a little bit of background about yourself, where you're from, how you ended up at the academy, how you got interested in protocol in the first place and just again a little bit of background about who you are.

Anglela:   2:01
Sure, so I actually didn't really know anything about the Naval Academy until the late nineties, when I was wooed by a midshipman who I had met in Northern California, and he invited me to ring dance. And so, after a couple of months of corresponding, obviously it was pre email. So it was all over snail mail. And, of course, it Bones, which, you know those aren't really around anymore. But I came out for men dance during commission a week and was completely and utterly just in awe of everything about the academy. Of course, commissioning week is a very romantic time to be there and so much pomp and circumstance. And I had had already attended finishing school, which is a fancy way to say protocol training in an 18 month program. And so I knew all about manners and all that kind of stuff, but it's not. It wasn't a typical thing for a young college kid my age to to know. And so, you know, there were just some really unique things at the academy that I thought was interesting that the midshipman just new, and as I was talking to my then date, he informed me that it was actually a four year requirement for graduation. For you guys to go through protocol. Medical training, which for something that speaks out about that kind of stuff. I was really amazed. And when touring dance. And obviously the rest was history. And so yeah, and F at that time, I actually commented to my husband that I thought it would be really cool to have that job to be able to be that protocol instructor for the brigade.

Grant:   3:37
So that's fantastic. And as a native Californian myself, where Northern California did Ah. Did you two meet?

Anglela:   3:45
Yes. So we were in Carmel.

Grant:   3:47
Oh, fantastic. It can't beat that. So I'm actually I grew up in San Jose, so, you know, and about 1/2 hour and 1/2 north there. But I'm actually going out to Monterey. I'm attending the Naval Postgraduate School. I literally just got my hard copy orders today, so I'm headed out there in August. Um, so I am very excited to be in the Monterey Carmel area. So that

Anglela:   4:08
is, They can't. They're at a naval postgraduate school as well. And it's a great space she'll enjoy.

Grant:   4:15
Absolutely. And thank you for giving us a little bit of background about yourself when you're talking a little bit for the episode started. It's funny. Ah, lot of people don't even know the job. Six exists. And for you to be like, man, I really want that job that sounds awesome and not to be there. That's phenomenal. And so can you just give people a little bit of background about the protocol program at the Naval Academy and kind of the reason that it's taught to Midshipman?

Anglela:   4:38
Yeah, sure. So you know, I actually don't know when it started. I think it's kind of always been an aspect of training. My husband's great grandfather was the class of 1911 and we have read your journal entries about, you know, the various types of training that they did, even all the way back then. And so you know, it is an element of professionalism these days, you know, in the civilian world, it's not unheard of for, ah company to take somebody who's interested in a job out for launch as a pre interview kind of the interview. You might think it's just lunch and getting to know each other. But a lot of times what it is is. It's sort of an initial screening of How do you hand your handle yourself in a social situation and you navigate a lunch and conversation? And how do you carry yourself? What's your poise and that kind of thing before they even consider bringing you in for the actual interview? And so I think, from a military perspective, it's part of becoming a well rounded officer. You are. I'm sure you've heard this a lot in your career. You are an ambassador of the United States and you know, the Naval Academy, the Navy, now that you're in. And so I think having that well or officer and being able to carry yourself in social situations is part of that. And so that training that aspect of the training is just another. Another way. We do that at the academy,

Grant:   6:02
definitely, and you talked about having a little bit of our formal education and etiquette and protocol. Is there any differences between the education received there and then etiquette that's specific to the military? And how do you get educated on the military specific aspects of this before assuming these roles and responsibilities as the protocol advisor.

Anglela:   6:22
Yeah, so there's not a lot of difference in, you know, the military aspect. My job. It was to fold. I am the common not sport apologize er and then the brigade social instructor. And what that means is, as Faras, the commandant's political advisor, You know all the parades of Ripley's summer. You know, if you have special congressional guests and King Hall, you know there's actually an order of precedence for the way people sit. If you have speakers, you know the order of precedence of flags behind the backdrop. That's all military protocol. So you know, there are references and and things like that that you goto learn that aspect of the military etiquette etiquette across the board. You know, whether it's civilian or military. It is pretty similar, I think, difference of how you might treat of female officer versus a civilian lady, right? There are some nuance there, but at the end of the day, it's about putting others ahead of yourself, and I think that's the big thing to remember. And that's the thing I try to instill most. You know what the midshipmen, especially the incoming pleads who may not have had a lot of experience if you're nervous and you don't know the right thing to do what I wish for, you do things the rightful, Yes, but the end of the day it's a fallow, you know, deferring to the people around you and looking for opportunities to serve people around you and putting them ahead of yourself. So,

Grant:   7:43
yeah, without a doubt. And so you mentioned that you get that opportunity to talk to the pleads when exactly really is your first opportunity to get to instruct the midshipman. Is it during sleep? Summer? Is it during the year? Kind of. What's that? First time you gotta make contact with the midshipmen.

Anglela:   7:57
Yeah, so we do a plead summer dining tutorial. And I mean, it was usually it's my sister companies first, all of 15 days consecutively, and we do a big, very fancy sit down dinner. And one of the first questions I ask is how many of you have ever had an experience like this where you have more than one fork on the table, you know, and it's, you know, fine dining. It's fine. China, you know, three glasses, the whole nine yards, and it's very interesting to me. How many coming and don't have experience eating in a fine down in situation and how overwhelming it can be when you sit and you look and you see three forks and three nines and whatever and they're like, I don't even know how to do this. So my first interaction with them, and then the second set Fleet summer, I'd get together with them on. We discuss, you know, things like sponsor etiquette. You know, it's one thing to be at home with your parents and leave your stuff all over or need a ride, or, you know, the various things, how you dine in mixed company. And then it's another thing to be a guest in someone's home that's supposed to feel like a home away from home. But they're still new, and you're still new and all the nuances of that. So we talked a lot about sponsor etiquette to during the summer, and then once reform happens, I meet with pretty much every class at least once a semester, and we usually split it up by regimen, and I'm sure you everybody knows the regiment is about 500. You know, about 500 shipment at a time, and we'll talk about everything from gosh, you know, email etiquette, correspondents, cocktail parties, types of dress. We talk about ship etiquette, right with the first class. We talk about what it's like to be a J on the fleet as they're getting ready to prepare to go out to the fleet and and what that looks interacting on board, ship and, you know, in the mess, you know, in the ward room all of that kind of stuff because there's a lot of military tradition and it's etiquette. Really,

Grant:   9:47
absolutely. And I think I think the funniest one that run up really is the email etiquette, cause I can't tell you how many times what I'm drafting an email that has, like, my signature at the bottom like my official title. I re read those, like eight times to make sure that I have everything format because, like you're saying in the military, the structure in the formality and the etiquette, it's tradition. It's regulated, it is by regulations. So I remember that trading actually specifically going through the academy and beat like e mails. Okay, Don't mess this up. Uh, address it correctly uh,

Anglela:   10:19
we have the nuance of, you know, social Media because a lot of ships that have their own Facebook page and all of that kind of stuff. And so we're entering new territory in how to continue to interact professionally with one another. While we we might correspond with one another through text message, which, you know, I think even just a couple of years ago, that was reserved for really close people. But nowadays it's not abnormal Thio to be texting forth with somebody. And how do you keep that on a professional level? Was still respecting seniority and keeping that in a professional way. So,

Grant:   10:55
yeah, and this is out of sheer curiosity of my own. Now is you talk about having these social media sites, especially for like company Facebook pages or literally command level Facebook pages. Do you give training's, too, like the company p Ay O's and pose at the Academy for Social Media Specific etiquette? Or is that something that's not part of

Anglela:   11:13
the new program? Apples through the, you know, the public affairs office, their domain and all that. But I do talk with the places. Of course, when they first come in because, you know, they've gone from civilian now to military professional, even though they're fresh out of the civilian world. And so it was like your social media pages, your instagram pages. Your Facebook page is all of that stuff. You know, we talk a lot about making sure those were private making sure you know, the friends that you have are people that you truly know because yes, you know, you could be tagged in something that doesn't necessarily have anything to do with you, but it will come back to you. And if it's something that's inappropriate or outside of the military code of justice, like all of that can come back to you. So we talked a lot about you are a military professional 24 hours a day, seven days a week. You don't put it on and off you sign that. Got a line on I day You made that decision and so that carries. You know, there's gotta be continuity in your life behind closed doors and out in the public. A swell so

Grant:   12:13
without a doubt. And that's something that one of my main mentors at the academy, Commander Murnane, he was my battalion officer. He was my the officer in charge of please Summer when I was a detailer. And the two of us have a fantastic relationship. That was always something he told me. He was like, Hey, look, when you commission, you're on the fleet near Izmit shipment. You are a military officer. You're a naval officer 24 7 That's who you are. That's like that doesn't go away. There's no on and off. Switch your professionalism. He's like, Now don't get me wrong. I kind of compare it to, like basically, I I don't know if I'm saying this correctly, but like a rheostat where you can like you, can dial it down a little bit in social settings and and the were relax and have fun. But at the end of the day, there's always a baseline level of professionalism that you have to conduct yourself with because you are a naval officer like you were saying earlier in the episode. You are representative. You're an ambassador of the United States Navy, the United States government, all of the above. So I think that's fantastic that you get the opportunity to really talk to all of the midshipmen in this setting where you're able to talk to him, and it's not like punitive. But it's just like, Hey, we need to realize that who we are in this new day and age, with social media and ability, spread information, you have to take care of that and make sure that all aspects of who you are and what you're representing are done so professionally. So that's great. So actually have one question. Now that you have the ability to address that, you're saying there's a cadence of meeting with him every semester. Is there ever an opportunity where you have, like a specialized training? Hypothetically, I know a lot of times, Midshipman, get a go to really fancy things Sometimes. Is there ever opportunity where you provide specialized training to someone or a group of midshipmen? Maybe that maybe going to represent the Naval Academy and a really formal setting.

Anglela:   13:50
Yes, actually, that happens more frequently than the other. Okay, like I mentioned earlier there, congressional visits that happened pretty regularly on the R or, you know, if there's a dignitary funeral, you know, we're very close to Washington, D. C. And a lot of times some of those responsibilities overlap. And so any time a midshipman's going out sort of in the public eye like that, I try to get in front of them. You know, superintendents tailgates. There's a lot of people that come on board for those, and so we try to meet a few days before we before and just go go over the You know, the basic reminders cause it can be a little nerve wracking, especially if you find out you know, somebody's gonna be there that you're interested in getting to know and talk to. But maybe it's a little nerve racking because they're a little bit higher ranked and you're interacting with. And so, yeah, I actually do that pretty frequently, especially during the fall. It's like, sometimes twice or three times a week,

Grant:   14:44
So that's one of our favorite jokes. Now that I'm old and in the fleet and stuff, it's always our favorite joke that admirals in Midshipman, they're basically the same thing. They go to all the fancy things I get treated with all like the special things, like whenever we're at a command like everything shuts down and all attention turns. If there's an admiral coming to our command or if there's a shipment coming to your command. Uh, but a lot of really all jokes aside, a lot of really awesome opportunities from a shipment to get to participate in these really cool events. So that's awesome that you get to do that. Now, I want a transition to a little bit. Just more personal question towards you is like you're saying this is your dream job. So how was this transition to assuming this role? And how have you enjoyed being the protocol advisor, the comet and the social instructors of the brigade so

Anglela:   15:27
far? Yeah. So it was a little surreal cause yeah, back in the nineties, when I said it, I never thought that would be it. You know, on opportunity. I'm not sure what. I just didn't really consider it. And with my husband being after duty and all roads end up into Annapolis, you'll figure that out eventually in the name. And so you are. And we've been here for, like, 12 years. And when I was given the opportunity the very first day, I walked on the art, which I've been to a 1,000,000 times for a 1,000,000 different things. It was just surreal. And it's very on inspiring to walk around and look at these young people who have willingly chosen Thio give their lives for our country And, you know, having been in a situation with my husband where, you know, my own Children have never known a time in America where we haven't been in a conflict. My oldest daughter was born in 2001 and so I don't take the commitment that they make lightly. And when I look at their faces, it is a very distinct reminder to me that these are young people who know exactly what they've decided to do when they when they signed that paper. And for me to be able to be a very small part of their education and their training and preparation for what they're about to do is very humbling for me. So I take a great amount of pride and being able to be a part of that

Grant:   16:49
that's way cool. I love that answer, and as someone who is relatively new to us and a and coming in and starting well but obviously you came to ring dance, which is like way cool, but new in terms of actually being on staff at the academy. What are some of the new ideas and focus is that you're trying to bring to this protocol job here at the Academy. And what are some of your main focus is that you're trying to get in messages that you're trying to give to the brigade of midshipmen.

Anglela:   17:17
Yeah, so I think the big thing for me is manners aren't reserved. Etiquette is not reserved for special occasions. It really is. It should be a threat of who we are. It should be a part of who we are, you know, are here or can be defined by how we treat people who really can't do anything for us. And so my big mantra is etiquette is where ethics needs everyday life. And you guys at the academy, you hear about ethics a lot, right and and I think it's really important to It's too, so that Fred it's not just ethics in making moral and right decisions. It's How dare you treating people Do you know you know the person that's emptying your trash every day, You know, for me, I go to the same brush restore every week, several times a week. Shame on me if I don't know that lady's name that runs my brushes across the scanner because I'm standing there probably for 10 minutes. I have four kids, so there's a lot of food. And if I can't take a moment in that time to get to know her a little better. And you know, I feel like our job as humans is as we come in contact with the people that are in front of us, are you? Do we leave them better than when we met them? And it could be that person, just you're passing on the street. Maybe it's just a warm smile. It's not anything, you know, Earth shattering. But are you seeing the people that are actually in front of you? And so for me, as I get in front of the Children, yes, do I want them to know the right for you? I want them to know, know the proper military protocol for, you know, whatever situation, absolutely. But at the end of the day, if they are simply putting a face to the person that's in front of them, they're humanizing and they're just just a simple greeting goes a long way. And I think we all at some point in our lives have been on the receiving under that me. We've been having a crummy day, you know, or whatever. And a complete stranger might just smile or say hello are you know something and you think, huh? You know, and it kind of turns your day around. I think oftentimes we minimalize those little interactions. But I think especially as you know, levers, those kind of things set of support. You know, when you go into a command and you choose to get to know the people who are working for you, that says a lot about your character. It says a lot about your leadership style. It says a lot about you, and so are you in it for you or you in it to help. The command is a hole to be better, and those little interactions manners right a long way. It's what can set you apart from being a good leader to being a great leader, that people say Hi. I want to follow that person, That person I know when he or she says ex wires E. They mean x, y or Z. No, it's about it's about that thread and who we are that connects us. You know, to one another, we can either choose to be very interview, introverted and kind of insular, right on our phones. That's a good thing. I'm guilty of that too. Or we can choose to put that, you know, device away or whatever is distracting us away. And for this a few minutes or the few seconds that were in front of somebody choose to engage with them on DCI choose to look for an opportunity toe, leave that person better than when you came across him.

Grant:   20:34
So has anyone asked you to teach some leadership classes at the academy to Oh, my God,

Anglela:   20:39
that I had the awkward beauty when actually, I think I would s someone

Grant:   20:47
needs to get you a permanent classroom and loose hall, cause, like, I just I could I wholeheartedly agree with everything you said, and I just want to take the opportunity now, just cause you've been talking about it, um, to give a big thank you to the entirety of the Millwood program. Um and then so for anyone who doesn't know Melwood is Basically they provide a lot of service for the academy. But specifically, a lot of the janitorial service is within Bancroft Hall. They take out our trash, they clean the bathrooms, they do all of that, um, in their Fantastic. So I just want to have a big shadow. I don't know if we'll ever hear it. Um, but Duke, who goes on who is part of a zero and clean 80 all the time

Anglela:   21:23
I years

Grant:   21:24
you make. So I I appreciate that he was there all four years. There was nothing better than waking up in the border. You might be having a bad day, but when you walk down that p way and you saw Duke and you gave him a fist bump and he said, All right, sir, you have a good day that would There's nothing like it. Well, and also, I'm a big personal fan of my guy Zane, who was who was a big Navy basketball fan. Um, and just like to have made those relationships with both those individuals and so many more that a part of Millwood Um, just a big thank you to all of them because everything they do to support brigade of midshipmen just truly phenomenal. So, um yes. So So thank you for bringing that up because, uh, because I probably would have would have forgotten And that I'm telling you, they need to get you a costume and loose all I need to listen to you talk way more than just this conversation right now. Um,

Anglela:   22:12
all right, I can tell you a funny story about that, please. So I talked to you about the please summer dining tutorial. Yeah, one of the initiatives that I brought back in talking with some of the upper class when they said we don't even remember, Please. Summer dining and that now that we've gone out in summer training's about myself in this evolution that I don't didn't remember anything, is there any way we could do it again? So I, you know, called King Hall. We chatted, and we're doing that for from the classman. Now we're doing like old, you know, dining tutorial during the lunch hour in the chest, and sweet Rhoda, who has been there for 30 years. So no one wants out. My old one was there when she was there. When you've been there for a while, this this sweetest interest says, Oh, man, this is my favorite job. I love working here. She loves in and she faithfully dump her. You know, decades now, which is really it's really great. And it's fun to see. You know, you guys come back and remember some of those rights workers and in Bellwood workers and the people in King Hall, and it's like for them, it's like seeing their babies come home. So that's

Grant:   23:19
what Ah, uh, most definitely Now one thing I do want to ask is, as you're coming in again, relatively new to us and a Are there any differences in some etiquette, like proper etiquette, as relates to military protocol? That might surprise some older graduates that things have changed and adjusted to this day and age? I guess. There any specifics? A specific examples you may have of military protocol are added it etiquette changing over the years.

Anglela:   23:49
Yeah, so I mean really, manners are timeless etiquette, timeless. You know, there is a There are things like calling cards. Nobody really leaves calling cards anymore. You know, you check into a new command. I think all of that's a little different. You know, most of time it's you're sending an email to your CEO ahead of time before you even report aboard ship. You're making that connection. Then of course, you need an office, Paul, but, um, yeah, So things like that have changed a little bit, but really, there's not a lot. And like I mentioned earlier, you know, the social media aspect in communicating the email or text message, That might be a little different and just you know that. But really, overall, not a lots changed. I mean, you still, you know, still the same fork. And I've still the same, you know, standing when a senior officer approaches the table, Well, that that's pretty much the same.

Grant:   24:37
Yeah, absolutely. And into some of those Like you're saying some of the military protocol, like standing when a senior officer walks in, Um, in your first interactions with the Cleves. Obviously, the food aspect of the fine dining are definitely knew. But what seems to be newest to most midshipman like, what are some things that midshipman like when you tell them that's the proper thing to do? They're like

Anglela:   24:59
Oh, my finger it. Well, there's two favorite things. That is, as I asked them, Is there ever a time? Elbows are on the table? No, Bam, no, My mom always told me No, and it's a trick question because Flynn courses it's not considered inappropriate for you to rest your forearms on the table. So that's a fun one. And then the one that gets them every single time is if you have something in your mouth that you don't want in your mouth, how do you get it out? So if you're a fish and you get a fishbone and you're, you know and in your bite and you don't want it, the rule of thumb is the way it goes in is the way it comes out. So if it goes in on a fork, it comes out on a fork, and they all kind of look at me like I'm a little bit crazy because I speak in a napkin, right, which isn't a bad option, except I'm always put to say, you know, Miss Rhoda doesn't really want to pick that napkin up after you're all finished. So the way it comes in and is the way it goes out and you spin you forward, put the times and you know people are moving their silverware. So it's less likely for somebody to notice that you're putting something on the floor for advice. Taking it off the fork. Then if you were to bring your napkin up to your face and you know clearly you're spitting something in your napkin. So that's one thing that they don't releasing tow there. They think I'm a little crazy.

Grant:   26:13
I love that. And besides, all of this knowledge just residing in your head as the absolute expert, is there any kind of textbook or book that you used to help teach this material to the leaves in the mid shipment at the Academy?

Anglela:   26:25
Yeah, So, um, I guess you know, really, I took on service etiquette when I married. My husband was Etiquette is, uh, is considered the the protocol bible of the military, and it's been realized a couple of arms. It used to be issued to you all up until recently. I think the last couple of years they've stopped issuing it, Um, but it does pretty much reside in my head, but it's only because I spent a good time, you know, a good bit of time once I'm married into the military. Just getting to understand the nuances of military protocol and the various aspects of my own husband's career. And how do you do that? So, yeah,

Grant:   27:05
absolutely. Um great. Whoa. With that. Do you have anything else that you would like to tell the academy insider audience about the protocol program or anything that you would like to leave the audience with? That you think they may find interesting or helpful or useful in regards to learning about the mid shipment experience at the Academy?

Anglela:   27:25
Yeah, I think so. One thing that I was thinking about in preparation for this, you know, there's a lot to be said about how we learn basic social graces. And for some, you know, some young people they go through maybe cotillion at a young age, you know, especially a lot of the Southern states. You know, a lot of the please will say, ma'am, I did this when I was in middle school. We did this and continue. I don't really remember much whatever, but as faras preparing to become a midshipman or if you've got a young person that's already been accepted in there went into one of the best things you can Dio is have regular family meal. It's where we learn to converse. It's where you learn those basic social graces. It's where you learn to, you know, disagree and without being disagreeable. You know, it's it's all of those social things, you know, and the safety and comfort of your family that we're learning. So, uh, you know, as you are continuing to prepare, I think looking for opportunities to practice those social, the social graces, like I said earlier, not just for special occasions, not just for the super super fancy restaurant or the once in a lifetime, but looking for opportunities to practice being comfortable and situations that you might otherwise be uncomfortable in. You know, put yourself out there. Don't be afraid to go make a conversation or introduce yourself to somebody you know that you don't know real well. Have some go to questions, practice having conversation on navigating, getting in and out of conversation. The more practice you get, the easier it becomes. And then when you do come on board those interactions which do happen more frequently than that will be a little less intimidating. And you'll feel a little bit more confident because at the end of the day, good manners, like I said, is about how you treat people right or and if you are making them feel comfortable than you're doing, you're doing your job. So I think just looking for opportunities to practice that is really, really important.

Grant:   29:24
Fantastic. And for any parent out there that may be wondering, like does this end at the Academy? Kind of when that happens. Ah, what would you tell them? Based on your experience with your husband serving the Navy? Does protocol and etiquette ever ended? Have you seen protocol and etiquette relevant in your life s so far throughout his entire naval

Anglela:   29:44
career? Yeah, so it doesn't end very much a part of it. You know, I could go on being a very new, you know, wife and my husband did a really good job before we got married. When we were engaged, he kind of got a panel of wives together. They were current military wives, you know, seasoned military wives, knew or military wives, retired military wives. And he said, I want you to tell her everything. I don't want you to. You know, don't Don't leave out the story about your husband deploys and the plumbing breaks and you've got a flood like I want her to know it all. So he really did me a great service by preparing me in that way and And I will say, you know, one memory that stands out to me is we? We lived overseas. He was in a joint command. We're in a joint tour with NATO in the nether. And, you know, I have little babies like times, commissary shopping. I don't think there was something going on and he called me at the commissary. He said So you know, I have some people here for work and they're visiting. Is there any chance that you can do dinner for us tonight? And I was said sure, and I didn't know if they get out anything of it. I think it was like, three in the afternoon. It was okay, Great. We'll be home by six. And I said Okay, so I really didn't have any other information about it. After it was all said and done, I found out that one of the gentleman in my room was the deputy undersecretary of defense for Intel, and they were doing some business around my dinner table and I didn't know it, but I knew enough about just basic social rates. Is, too, you know, said a decent table to know how to introduce myself, how to interact with them and what not. And, um, you know, as a military wife, that was great for my husband. And so I think it doesn't ever really end it. Sze eyes that just like for you as a military member, your military officer, 24 hours a day, seven days a week And that doesn't ever turn on and off. And I think for manners across the board, whether your civility in a military, it's not something that you pull out for the special occasions, that really is something that we should practice just because it's the right and simple thing to do. So

Grant:   31:56
it's phenomenal. I everything you said so far today has been been great and I do want to repeat one line and please correct me if it was incorrect. But when you said manners are were ethics meets daily life and everything. Okay, um, that I think that's so cool. And I think that's a ah much needed approach to how we how we address protocol and etiquette at the Naval Academy is taking it away from Onley like pigeonholing etiquette to these fancy formal evenings and making it all about your daily life and how you live day to day and the manners with which you treat people so and thank you so much for everything you're doing for the Naval Academy and four teaching all of the mid shipment about everything that you've talked to us in the academy inside our audience about today. So thank you,

Anglela:   32:49
George. It's like

Grant:   32:49
absolutely anything else you want to say to the academy inside our audience before we wrap it up here today.

Anglela:   32:56
No, I mean, you know, when you're coming to visit your mid, uh, you know, ask him about program asking what they're looking for. Some of them might be a little frustrated with me because we did dance instruction the other day, which it imagine some something fun not so much, but already stated, you know, it very much is a good skill to have because you never know when you're gonna need it. So

Grant:   33:18
absolutely. Well, Angela, thank you so much for your time and preparing and coming on to talk with us today. We really, really appreciate

Anglela:   33:24
it. Thank you for having me.

Grant:   33:28
Wow. How impressive is she? M? Alright, like, Oh, my goodness. Well, one, I hope you guys learned a little bit about the protocol and etiquette training at the Naval Academy and to just some general life and leadership lessons out of that episode. We're truly blessed to have Angela come join us today and share all of that wisdom. So thank you to her. And, as always, make sure to subscribe to the podcast and leave me a review on Apple podcast. I really appreciate all you guys again. My name's Grant for me or the academy insider. And thank you so much for letting me be your guide to the Naval Academy.